The Night Will Go As Follows
by AlwaysAndForever13
Summary: AU. Set in NM. Edward leaves Bella promising to erase himself all together. Wanting to believe that what they had was real, Bella soon realizes she is pregnant, but refuses to find Edward or tell anyone.
1. Heartbeat

A/N: Okay well the votes had it, and I got a little too excited to start over. Once again this will be nothing like the last book. This is the way I imagined it, the way I wrote it. I hope you enjoy!

I don't own anything!

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><p>So much can change in a month. People can die people can be born. People can leave people can come back. There is no saying what a month will bring someone. Everything changes much faster than the human race would like. We all fear about growing older and dying. I used to fear that as well, but in light of recent events I welcome it.<p>

I looked down at my stomach, still flat with no need for suspicion. But that will soon change. I don't know what will happen, if I'll blow up within a matter of weeks because of the unnatural circumstances, or if this will be normal and take nine months. I hope for the latter, but really when has anyone been recorded carrying a half vampire fetus. Not many.

It was 5:30 in the morning. I could hear Charlie begin to shuffle around his room getting ready for another day of work. I still had over an hour to wake up and get ready for my day. However, I never actually want to close my eyes anymore. I've seen too much, heard too much. I know that if I close my eyes, then it will all come back to haunt me in my dreams.

He left. I took a deep breath, calming myself down. He left me alone. It was as simple as that. He left me three weeks ago. All alone, and pregnant. He left to chase some distraction of his, probably to find a more beautiful vampire than my plain, human self. He probably wants to stop worrying about how fragile I was. He wanted someone he didn't have to save from tripping over stick every day.

He said he would live without a trace; that I would never have to remember him, and our time together. It would all just be a distant memory. I sighed, placing a hand over my stomach. He never thought that this would happen. He didn't think he would live a trace so huge that I would have to carry it around for nine months.

That was probably the worst part. Not the memories I would have to repress at some point. Or the fact that I still have pictures of us together that I would have to burn. Not even that fact that I was still in love with him, and he took pieces of my heart when he left that I will never get back. No the worst part of his leaving was the fact that I had to carry around the fact that we were together. I will have to carrying it with me for nine months and then care for it every day of my life for 18 years at least.

I got up from my place on my bed and walked over to my dresser where the at home pregnancy test still was. I had to drive all way to a neighboring town so that no one would recognize me and be able to let it slip to Charlie.

On my drive home I felt as though the test was going to burn a hole through my bag, the weight of the answer pushing me down. Waiting for the answer seem to take longer than the half hour drive I took. I just sat there staring at the stick wondering what would happen if there was a little pink plus.

Well, for one thing I would have to tell Charlie and Renee. Tell them that he knocked me up and then left before I even had a chance to consider the possibility that it may happen.

I could see the disappointment on their faces. My mother sighing, looking at my father as though she could have prevented this if I just stayed with her and Phil. That's probably true, but I would have never realized what love was unless I came to live with Charlie.

I buried my face in my hands. This wasn't supposed to happen. Vampires weren't supposed to be able to reproduce. Then again not many vampires ever had _relations_ with a human.

But he wasn't supposed to _leave_ me. He told me he loved me. He said he couldn't live without me. Was everything he ever said to me a lie? Did he really not care for me? Did he just grow tired of me?

There were so many questions left unasked.

Of course, there was another option. I didn't really need to have the baby. This could all just be a terrible dream. Then he really could keep his promise. If I did this, then there would be no trace of him. He would be erased from my life once and for all.

I ran my hands through my hair. How could I even be considering this? This is still a life after all. _But you don't know what it is going to become,_ a voice countered in my head.

I truly didn't know what was going to become of the baby. Would it become a parasite and drain the life out of me. After all it was half vampire. Don't they need blood to survive? What would my baby need to live?

I didn't know if this would be safe for me. I couldn't live Charlie or Renee with a half vampire baby…

I looked at the clock on the wall. Two minutes had passed. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath then walked over to the sink to meet my fate.

A little pink plus showed in the box.

Staring at it on my dresser now it doesn't seem like such nightmare. Now it just looked like any other geometrical symbol. Yet that little thing had so much weight on it.

I sighed and sat down at my desk. Can I really raise a child? Especially one that is only half human. It doesn't even make sense! This shouldn't have happened! I don't understand how it did happen.

I rolled my eyes at myself. Of course I knew _how _it happened. I just didn't understand how it _could have_ happened. It was said to be impossible. Yet here I am a month later, sick every morning, barely being able to eat anything, and tired. Always so tired.

Tired from trying to act like I'm okay. Tired from trying to act like I never loved him as much as I really did. So tired from trying to act like there was nothing out of the ordinary happening to me. With every day, however, the last one was getting harder and harder.

_This could all be a dream,_ I thought._ This could all be over in a matter of minutes and no one would know the difference._

I know I shouldn't even be considering it, but every time I thought about what the child may become, just terrified me more. I mean what if I did survive the birth? What if the baby was human? Then I could care for it, easily.

But what if I survived, but it was still a vampire. How could I can for a vampire infant? I could go and catch its meals for it. Or maybe I would become its meal.

Then there is the question about if I didn't survive the birth.

First things first, if I was going to have this baby, Charlie would need to know what to do. He couldn't care for a child that wasn't human.

I opened my desk draw, shuffling through it until I found a piece of paper. Grabbing the closest pen to me I began to write:

_Dear Charlie and Renee,_

_If you are reading this, then I didn't make it through the birth of my child. I really don't know what to say, how to explain that I knew this was a possibility. It was just something I felt._

_I need you two to do something for me. I need you to find Edward. He left me without knowing that I was pregnant. He needs to know. He needs to take care of the baby._

_I love you both, and I know you would be able to care for the baby much better than anyone else, but Edward needs to raise _this_ baby. I can't explain why, only that the baby needs to have its father in its life._

_I love you both,_

_Bella_

I looked down at my letter. It almost felt like a waste of paper. They would never tell Edward about his child, especially if it killed me. They would never forgive him for doing this to me, even if it weren't his fault. He didn't think this could happen; otherwise he would have never let things get out of hand a month ago.

I sighed, trying to repress that memory once more as I got up from my desk. I ruffled through some clothes I left on the floor until I found a shoebox. Taking a marker I wrote EDWARD on the top.

I sunk to the floor and put the note in it. If anything my mother would look through this before she threw it away.

Next I put the pregnancy test in it. I felt as though I should throw it away, but it was still so hard to believe that this was all still happening to me. It's almost as though Edward's box was everything I didn't believe, and nothing I could forget.

Sorting through the things in my room I found more things I'm surprised he didn't take with him when he erased himself from my life. A picture of us I put in my sock draw. Alice took it during the summer when neither of us, well at least I didn't, notice. He had his arm wrapped around my waist smiling down at me, as I angled myself a little further away so I could look into his eyes. I was giving him a questioning look, but smiling all the same.

Looking down at the photograph was like looking into the life of two strangers. They looked in love, almost as though they really were the only two people in the world. The boy looked at the girl as though she were the most precious thing in the world, yet his eyes also told you just how fragile she was. The girl looked up at him as though he was her savior. It was like he showed her a world that she only dreamed of, something that belonged in the movies.

That's just it though. The love I believed we shared was something that belonged in the movies. Two people who against all odds fell in love, constantly put up to tests that may drive them apart, yet their love always conquered. Or at least it used to.

We were star-crossed lovers like Romeo and Juliet. One cursed to living a life in the night, while the other cursed to live out the sun alone.

Except Romeo and Juliet really did beat the odds. Even in death they were together. The love I thought Edward and I shared was clearly all in my head. We were too different to love each other for eternity. It just wasn't meant to be.

I quickly wiped away the tear that escaped from my eye, as I placed the picture in the box. Next was a dried up flower. It was from the meadow where Edward exposed himself to me. He had placed one in my hair a long time ago when we were spending one of those rare sunny days away from public eyes. Closing my eyes I could almost feel the warmth on my skin from the sun as his butterscotch eyes stared down at me.

Everything was a lie, I reminded myself. All a lie.

I rolled my eyes looking at the next object. A CD he had given to me. I quickly shoved that into the box knowing that it contained the lullaby he wrote for me. I didn't have enough time in the world to contemplate why he wrote a lullaby for me if he clearly didn't love me.

Lastly I had the note he wrote me so long ago. Be Safe.

I sighed closing the lid and pushing the box into my closet. It was now 6:45. Charlie was shuffling downstairs about to leave for work. I took a deep breath leaning back resting on the wall gazing up at the ceiling.

How was I going to tell Charlie that his only daughter was now pregnant? It was only the second month of school, my senior year. I had to finish school for him and my mother. I groaned. Life couldn't get worse.

A half an hour later I was in my car ready for another day at Forks High School. The only thing getting me through the day was my doctor's appointment I scheduled for later today. I mean there still was a possibility that I was pregnant.

Who am I kidding? I knew I was. I've been sick every morning, and I'm already starting to gain weight, even if I could barely hold anything down long enough to digest.

The day moved on uneventful as I weighed the options of keeping the baby. Each side had good points. One, I couldn't take care of a baby who was a vampire, and I could not give that responsibility to someone else.

On the other hand, there still was a fifty percent chance that the baby would be human. Still fifty percent isn't that comforting.

"Bella, are you okay?" Angela asked me as I sat down next to her a lunch. "You've been looking a little pale lately."

I smiled weakly at her. I already was pale, now I was looking more like ghost. "I'm okay Ange. I think I have just a little cold. I'll be fine."

She nodded letting it go. I have been getting this question a lot lately. Sometimes I feel as though it would be easier if I could just yell back at them that I'm pregnant and you would look pale too if you had been up for three hours throwing up. But that probably isn't the best way to handle things.

Stupid vampires. Life would be so much easier if they really were a myth like everyone believed them to be.

Nothing made sense to me anymore. At this point I wouldn't be surprised if Angela was a witch and Ben was a werewolf. Having a witch on my side could be pretty cool though.

"Isabella," a voice called to me as I stared at the wall in the waiting room. "The doctor will see you know."

I got up and follow the lady in bright pink scrubs to the back room. I barely remember driving here. The rest of my school day just went by in such a haze nothing seemed to actually stick out to me. It wasn't raining to I didn't have to drive slowly, and there aren't many hills to grab my attention. It's like I've been a zombie until now.

My room was white and plain. I sat uncomfortably on the table in my dressing gown. My heart was hammering; my feet kept jumping up and down. I couldn't keep still. My life could change in the matter of an hour.

"Hello Isabella," a young doctor said opening up the door. He was tall, probably around six feet, with jet-black hair and piercing gray eyes. He had a very strong jaw, high cheekbones, and olive colored skin. He was very handsome. "My name is Dr. Booth."

I forced a smile, not being able to move my hands from my lap. There was something different about him. Something about him made me want to trust him…

"So, Isabella, you haven't been feeling too well lately?" he asked taking a seat opposite of me, pen in hand ready to write.

"Bella," I stated, finally looking into his eyes. He smiled. I took a deep breath and shrugged. "I feel fine, it's just every morning I get sick. I can't seem to be able to eat anything without feeling sick afterwards, but I don't have a temperature."

He nodded, writing something down before looking back up at me. "When was your last cycle?"

I grimaced trying to remember. "A little over two months ago," I whispered.

"Have you been sexually active in that time?"

"Yes."

He nodded again. "Well, everything seems to be normal as of now. Another nurse will come in to do some blood work and we will get to the bottom of this." He stood up and put a hand on my knee. "Would you like me to get anyone from the waiting room to come back and wait with you."

I shook my head. "No, I'm alone."

He pressed his lips together and nodded before leaving me to my own thoughts. So much was changing. The doctor and I knew what was wrong with me. The blood work was unnecessary.

The blood work happened faster than I thought, and too my surprise I didn't feel faint at all. Instead I just stared straight ahead and waited for it to be done. Then before I knew it my results were in.

Dr. Booth came back into the room, and quickly sat down across from me again. "Bella, according to your blood work you are pregnant. I would like to do a quick ultrasound to make sure everything is in order and then we can talk about what is to come and what options you have."

He pulled over the machine that was in the corner. After he sorted it all out, a little black and white picture came on the screen.

Dr. Booth smiled at me and pointed to the center of the screen. "That right there, Bella, is your baby."

I stared at the screen, not believe that that little thing was my baby. It was only the size of a peanut, yet it already was functioning, making it's brain and heart. It was mesmerizing.

I didn't even realize the doctor leave the room, until he came back and handed me a picture of _my_ baby.

"I thought you would want the first photo of your baby," he said smiling at me. "Now Bella, I know you are only 18 and raising a child can be extremely hard. Is the father in the picture?"

I shook my head. Not caring to elaborate.

He nodded, looking solemn. "Well, it will be difficult to do this on your own, but you do have options. There is always adoption and then there is the last option."

I nodded, knowing what option would probably be the safest and smartest. "Yes, I know."

"Bella, did the father do something that he is not in the picture?" he asked pulling his chair up closer to me.

I shook my head slowly. "No, no. He was very kind. He just moved recently, and the way we left things weren't exactly the best."

"Okay, well if you need to talk to anyone, there is a hotline for young mothers. I will have the secretary give you the number. They will help you with whatever decision you make."

"Thank you," I said softly getting up.

"If you decide to keep the baby, than then just call the office and make an appointment with me in three weeks. Okay?" I nodded staring down at the ground. "Take care Bella," he said touching me lightly on the arm.

I pulled back a little, not even noticing what I was doing, and turn to get my clothes together to leave.

The ride home seemed longer than before. The options I had fogging my mind. I could not take care of this child on my own. No one knows what it will be! The Cullens wouldn't even know! This has never happened before. Then again no one actually knew the vampire myth was in fact reality.

When I finally made it home, I rushed to my room, dropping my bag at the door and collapsing on my bed.

My choice was clear. There was never really a choice for me. How could I care for a baby that wasn't even human?

I sighed reaching into my back pocket pulling out the picture Dr. Booth gave me. That little peanut was my baby, though. That peanut was the last piece of proof that my love for Edward was real, and not just a hallucination.

I knew if I got rid of the baby I would get rid of the last piece of my heart that was still able to beat every day. I would rip apart my soul if I got rid of it. Staring at the little peanut in the photograph, I knew my answer was clear, even if it was the best decision.

I was going to be a mother.

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><p>AN: I hope this was good! Please review and let me know what you think!


	2. Say You'll Haunt Me

A/N: Soooooo many story alerts. Now if all of those were reviews I think I would have fallen over from the positive response! So thank you. I'm glad you are enjoying this:)

I don't own anything, trust me.

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><p><em>His hands grazed up my arm slowly, a little hesitantly like he needed to make sure he could remain in control of his nature. His lips moved from my shoulder to my collarbone, then slowly up my neck to right under my jaw.<em>

_He stopped for a moment looking straight into my eyes, almost like he wanted to freeze time, remember everything that was happening and how it was happening. Then he pulled me down on top of him as he laid back on the bed._

_My breath caught, hardly believing the he was letting this happen. I closed my eyes to his touch, feeling oddly hot despite his cold hands. Everything he did put my mind in a haze, trying to grasp the fact that he wanted me. Right now, we were together, and he loved me._

_Seeming to read my mind he caught my face in his hands pushing my hair out of my face staring deeply into my eyes. "I love you," he whispered before kissing me softly on the lips._

I shot up out of bed breathing heavily. I looked around my room trying to find my bearings while rubbing my hand over my face and through my hair. I slowly got out of bed, still dizzy from my dream and made my way to the bathroom.

I splashed water on my face trying to cleanse my mind in a way. Lifting my head up, I looked at myself in the mirror. I have already gained weight in my face, and I was barely four weeks pregnant.

I groaned and shook my head, wandering back to my room. I quickly grabbed my boots and jacket. As the cool fall breeze hit my face I realized how stupid it was of me to be walking outside in the middle of the night. After everything I've seen it should make me want to always stay inside, especially now that I don't have someone who is the most venomous creature in the world at my side.

But I couldn't go back to sleep, especially with that dream on my mind. I thought I repressed that memory for my own good. I couldn't relive that night over and over again. I would go insane.

The way he held me and kissed me that night, though, made me feel as if I was the only person in the world for him. He truly made me believe that he loved me with all of his soul.

Then a week later, he was gone.

I stood in the middle of an intersection, pondering which way I should go. It was like the decision I made about the baby. One was easier, and led me straight back to my safe life. The other had a hill and was a longer way home, but it had a better view of the mountains. Naturally I took the right and started to climb up the hill.

Everywhere I went I felt like I could still feel him watching me even though I knew that not to be true. Just the thought of him haunted me more than the baby that was growing inside of me.

I still hadn't been able to block the memory of him away in my mind; instead he was in almost every thought. Whether I was wondering where he was now, or if my name ever crossed his mind anymore. The memory of him just consumed my thoughts, haunting me daily.

It was foolish really. He should be the furthest thing from my thoughts. I mean, yes I was carrying his child, but he left. He didn't want me. I meant nothing to him anymore. So why should I be thinking of someone who used me and left me as though I was nothing more than a pair of old shoes?

Because no matter how long I live I knew that I would always be in love with him. He broke my heart into a million pieces and seemed to take a part of my soul with him when he left, but it didn't matter. There was a part of me that knew he was my soul mate, even if I wasn't his.

I crossed my arms over my chest as I casually walked down the deserted street. There was so much on my mind. What do I say to Charlie or Renee? What do I say to Jacob? Do I tell them? Do I try to keep it a secret for a little while longer?

I had to tell my parents at some point. They would notice that I was gaining weight and changing my diet. Plus I would need their help to raise the baby if I wanted to finish high school.

Jacob was a different story. We had only just started hanging out. Just being around him was starting to heal me. The only problem was he didn't know about the Cullens.

He knew the story, he helped me figure out what Edward was before he told me. He didn't believe in the story he told me, however. But Billy knew. Bill knew the stories; he knew the truth. If I tell Charlie or Jacob, Billy will find out. When he finds out…

I have no idea what may happen if he were to find out. He had warned me about them, tried to get me to stop seeing Edward countless of times. If he found out that Edward got me pregnant, then I don't know what he would do.

He may try to convince me to get rid of it. He may even try to take matters into his own hands.

At the same time, though, he knew stories of ancient times. He knew all about the _cold ones_. What if he had a story about this? Maybe his story would be able to save me, or at least let me know a head of time if it was impossible for me to survive.

I stopped at the stop sign in from of me. A crow was resting on top of it. The crow was looking around, not really at anything, but then suddenly stopped and it's eyes snapped right to me.

I froze. Crows are a symbol of death. They are scavengers, going after the dying or dead. Was the fact that it was staring at me mean something?

I rolled my eyes and continued my way down the long stretch road in front of me.

Things were starting to go to my head. I take any little think happening in my life and turn it into a sign that I was about to die. I needed to relax. According to Dr. Booth worrying was not good for the baby, but that's easier said than done when I'm carrying around a half vampire child.

When I finally made it back to my house I quietly made my way into the darkened living room. Silently moving up the stairs to my bedroom, I realized something. No matter what anyone says to me about being pregnant, I've already made up my mind. No matter what, I plan on bringing this baby into the world.

OoOoOoOoOoO

**TWO MONTHS LATER**

It was almost December. It has been almost three months since Edward left me, three months that I've been pregnant, and no one knew. I've gained almost fifteen pound, and a little bump was finally started to show. Once again, however, no one knew.

I hung out with Jacob almost every day, and yet he had no idea. Even though I was still getting morning sickness everyday, Charlie had no idea. I was surrounded by idiots.

I had to tell someone. I can't keep walking around like nothing is wrong with me, like I'm not walking with a life growing inside of me. At the same time though I couldn't face that fact that I was pregnant. It was like if I told someone, even if I said it out loud then it would be real.

Yes, I've been to the doctors. I even have a picture of the little thing. Though no matter how many times my doctor says it, or how many time I see the picture, or how many times I have to run to the bathroom before I get sick, I can't actually come to the terms with the facts.

I am pregnant.

Jacob needed to be first. I needed to tell someone besides my own family. If I told him first than maybe I could have someone on my side when I sat down with my father. I needed someone.

Charlie was gone for the day, fishing again. I tried to call Jacob to finally let people know, but Billy said that he wasn't home either.

Annoyed and lonely I made my way to my car. I started to drive. I ended up nowhere, and at the same time where everything started. Suddenly within two hours I was standing in the middle of the meadow where I first saw Edward in the sun.

It looked different than when I first was here. It looked almost barren, like a wasteland. It just didn't look as beautiful as it used to be. It was like he took the beauty of this place when he left.

Suddenly the sound of a twig snapping came from behind me. I spun around thinking it was only an animal or something. I wasn't far off. It was an animal, but not a deer or a bear like I was hoping. It was an animal I thought would no longer come near me.

Laurent.

He stood up from his crouching position and stared at me. "Bella?"

My eyes widened. "You remembered?"

He tilted his head slightly. "What are you doing out here by yourself? I figured Edward would not let you out of his sight after what happened in the spring."

_Lie Isabella_, a velvet voice told me in my head. "He will be here soon."

"I would have thought so. Something interesting has come to my attention though. I wanted to make sure they wouldn't have a problem with me here so I went to their home. The interesting part is it seemed like their home has not been used for some time."

_You must lie better,_ the voice told me harsher this time. "The family has left, but Edward stayed behind to look after me."

He cocked his head to the side. "While that is believable because his scent is still on you, it's extremely faint."

What? His scent was still on me? "He left for a hunting trip, but I'm expecting him within the hour."

"But by that time I will be long gone." He started to walk closer to me. "See, Bella, there is a reason why I am back in this town. There is a reason why I came looking for you. Victoria is here as well."

He stared at him shell-shocked. James' mate who had red hair that looked as though fire was coming out of her head. "She's in town, and you're in town," I said softly.

A small smile started to spread across his face. "We're both in town with the same goal. To see you die." I froze. "You see when your Edward killed James, he started a war with his mate, Victoria. She believes that fair is fair, you know."

I stared at him, unable to speak, unable to move. He just kept moving closer and closer. I suddenly realized that it didn't matter if the baby was going to become a monster. The baby and I were going to die.

He chuckled to himself, moving closer to me. "It is strange that your Edward would allow you to be by yourself. I mean with the way he acted in the clearing all those months ago. I figure he would never let you out of his sight. Odd," he mused.

There was a ruffle behind me in the forest. Nausea overcoming me. Laurent was slowly coming closer and closer to me. Nothing was stopping him now, he wouldn't get distracted when he was so close to him goal.

He got to his point, crouching downward. "Maybe your Edward doesn't truly love you. No vampire could ever really love a human. We get distracted too easily when you are so fragile. Sad that your death won't have the same affect James' death did for Victoria."

My eyes widened. "Oh trust me Bella," he said softly, "you would be thanking me if you knew what Victoria had planned for you. I am doing you a favor."

In my eyes it didn't seem like a favor at all, but I didn't think I would have any say in this.

He was very low now, seeming like a lion almost. I felt like a gazelle or a deer stuck in headlights. This shouldn't have happened; I shouldn't have come here. It was stupid really. I knew going this far away from town, from civilization, was such a bad idea when I knew what was out in the world.

Laurent locked eyes with mine. The blood red eyes burning holes threw me. My instincts were telling me to run, but my feet were glued to the ground. Suddenly he leapt towards me.

I threw up my arms, waiting for the pain to kill my baby and me. It never came, though. I opened my eyes to see Laurent standing in front of my, staring at the forest.

I heard a low hiss coming from him, as he suddenly took off in the opposite direction from me. I stood there in shock, not quite understand what could have forced Laurent away. Unless Victoria was in the shadows…

But it wasn't.

It wasn't another vampire; it wasn't anything I believe existed even though I knew the story. I just never believed in them.

Four wolves came out of the forest. One more jumped out at the far end taking off in the direction of Laurent. The others started to take off, running faster than normal wolves. All of them except for one.

A huge reddish-brown wolf ran towards me. He stopped right in front of me and bowed his head. When he looked into my eyes I saw something so familiar about his eyes, but I couldn't place it. There was something different about these wolves.

Suddenly the wolf growled and took off with the other wolves. I knew that I should run now. I had the chance to live, for my baby to live. However, I just couldn't believe that I was safe, that nothing was going to hurt me.

I sunk slowly to the grass staring in the direction all the mythical creatures ran. I gazed after them, not being able to register that I should be running for my life and the baby's. I needed to leave.

Next thing I knew I woke up on Jacob's couch. He was sitting on the floor, snoring. His hand held mine in his slumber. I picked up his hand, trying to not wake him, and surveyed his warm hand.

It seemed almost hot. It wasn't normal. It was like he could burn me if he held his hand too long on mine. This was not right. This is not how human beings feel. There was something so wrong with him.

He groaned. "Bella?" he said sleepily.

"Jacob, do you have a fever or something? Are you okay? You feel too warm. Let's go to the hospital," I said sitting up, pulling on my jacket.

"Woah Bella," he said pushing me back down on the couch. "Trust me there is nothing wrong with me."

"No Jake, this is not normal."

"Bella," he said cupping my face, "nothing is wrong with me."

I rolled my eyes at him. But then I looked at his face, into his eyes. They were the eyes of the wolf. The same color brown, the same look in them where you couldn't actually tell how old his was because there was such wisdom in them, yet such childlike playfulness.

"Jake, how did I get here," I asked quietly and calmly.

He pulled back from me looking out the window. "Bella, you came here on your own. I actually don't know how you got here because you came directly to this couch and passed out."

"No, I was in the meadow. I remember laying down in the meadow and falling asleep."

"What meadow?"

Now I was getting annoyed. I pushed him back and stood up, pacing back and forth in the living room. "No Jake, I was in the meadow."

He stood up as well. "No Bells."

"Jake, just stop lying and tell me the truth. You were in the meadow too weren't you?"

"I don't know what meadow you are talking about," he said raising his voice and holding up his hands.

"Jacob!" I groaned. "You are the wolf that went after Laurent in the meadow!"

He stared at me, leaning back on his heels. "Bella, there is a lot that you don't understand. Don't go around-"

"Jacob, I know it was you. I'm not stupid." _Well I could be taken for that way for believing I couldn't get pregnant…_ "Just tell me the truth. You have been avoiding me for a couple of days now. I deserve the truth. I've been through so much shit these past few months, I don't need to be lied to by my best friend."

He sat down on the coffee table rubbing his hands over his face. "You're right. I shouldn't be lying to you." He reached for my hand and pulled me towards him. "I'll tell you everything; just listen."

Then he told me everything. He avoided me because he was becoming the mythical creature he told me about. He was now a werewolf. He blamed his transformation on the Cullens coming back to Forks. He thought their presents somehow ruined his life by making him a werewolf.

Jacob spoke quickly and quietly, almost like other people could hear him. Soon I learned that that was true. His pack brothers could hear everything he thought when he transformed. And when he told me that, I knew I couldn't tell him about the baby. Everyone would know.

His pack would come after me. They would come after the baby. They would kill us both. I couldn't tell anyone. Once one person found out, they all would, and then… Then the baby and I would be in danger.

No one could ever know.

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><p>AN: Sorry this took me awhile to finish, my charger for my laptop quite working. I hope you like this chapter. Things are going to start heating up soon ;)


	3. All The Same

**Alice's POV**

This wasn't how things were supposed to turn out. The future was set. It was so clear to me before we left, before Jasper lost control. She was going to be one of us, it was obvious to everyone but Edward. However, no matter how clear my vision was becoming, it quickly disappeared.

I never blamed Jasper, no one did. What happened was a complete accident. Edward did act rationally, though. Bella was too vulnerable to be human around a group of vampires who have denied their true nature for so long.

There were other ways to handle this situation. Her morality was almost a joke. She was a walking time bomb even without vampires around her. I didn't feel right leaving her alone. I worried that something would happen to her, something that could have been prevented if we were there to save her.

Edward wouldn't listen to me. He believed that we were the reason she was always an inch from death. We were the reason that she had so many near death experiences when she came to Forks.

I never believed that. If it weren't for Edward's draw to her, she would have been crushed by Tyler's car. If Edward had no draw to her, he wouldn't have wanted to kill her when they first met, and everything would have been different.

We were the reason she was still alive. Edward's love for her saved her life in more ways then he realizes.

Suddenly a wave of calmness came over me. I turned to see Jasper waiting for me at the door. I smiled at him and danced to his side, kissing him softly on the cheek. He never believed me when I told him it wasn't his fault that no one blamed him. He already was a better man than 95 percent of the vampire population.

"You were worrying," he said softly staring down at me. "Were you thinking about her?"

I looked down shyly. He knew me so well. He could look at me and know how much I am missing my best friend. I felt guilty feeling that way around him; it wasn't like he hated himself enough for what happened. I just seemed to add to it.

"I'm sorry. I know how guilty you feel, and I don't blame you at all for what happened." He turned around from me. I quickly placed my hand on his check and forced him to look at me. "I don't Jasper. You know that. I just miss her, that's all. And I know Edward does too, but he is too stubborn to admit it and go back to her," I stated harshly, my temper rising.

Quickly my anger was taken away from me. Jasper always controlled my emotion more than others. He hated seeing me anything but perfect. He always wanted me to feel the best all the time.

"Jasper, I can't _not_ be mad at Edward right now. I understand where he is coming from, but to leave Bella the way he did… It just wasn't right or fair in any way. I don't understand how he could do that to her."

Jasper wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into his chest. "He didn't have a choice Alice. He had to keep her safe from our kind, from me."

"You couldn't help yourself Jasper. _No one_, not even Edward, blames you."

"I know that, but Edward blames himself for what happened. That is hardly far to him. He's miserable without her, and my gift can't even help him."

"The only person who can help Edward is Bella. He needs her forgiveness. Even then he wouldn't be able to forgive himself. I just worry that she won't be able to stay safe without us there."

"You promised him you wouldn't interfere with her life anymore," he pressed.

I walked away from knowing I couldn't do anything for her anymore, no matter how much I wanted to. She was on her own now. "I know Jasper, I know. I just need to make sure she is okay. I don't know what I would do if she were to die."

"She's going to die some day Alice."

"She wasn't."

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

Before Bella, Edward went through life in a swift motion. It was almost like he was just waiting. Waiting for something to change; for something to light up his life and make it worth living again.

He was the only one who didn't have someone to share this eternal life with. To him it seemed surreal. Living a life in an endless motion. No one to change anything, no one to share anything. He was alone in the worst way possible.

Then Bella moved to Forks. At first he thought believe it was God's way of punishing him. Almost like he was being damned for the way he lived his life when he left Carlisle. Only I knew what kind of blessing Bella was to him.

She saved him. She saved him from himself and from an eternity of loneliness. She was everything to him; she'll always be everything to him.

Then it all changed. He worried that he would be the cause of her untimely death. Edward would have never been able to deal with himself for another century if his presence somehow killed his one true love.

So he did what he must, he left. He left her to fend for herself, to miss him in everyway possible and live life like a zombie. At least that's how I would live if I ever lost Jasper.

However, there was something about their love that was different from every one of ours.

Somehow, their love seemed more intense. It might have been because Bella was so fragile, Edward was more protective than any of us. It might have been because Bella's life was so short compared to ours, that they didn't see the point of not loving each to the fullest each and every day.

Their love was nothing like the movies. It was a love that made the movies jealous. It was tragic, yet poetic. It was passionate, yet comforting. In a way, their love made me believe in soul mates.

Yes, I knew Jasper was mine. I knew it before we even met thanks to my gift. Yet, seeing Bella and Edward together would convince anyone that two souls were actually meant for each other.

They completed each other in everyway. Even though they were now apart from each other, I still believe that they are so attuned to one another that Bella would be able to feel Edward if he was around her, and Edward would be able to pick out her heartbeat even if she was in a crowd of a thousand people.

He never understood that she would never be able to love again. Yes, she may love someone in the future, but she would never be in love again.

Her heart would be broken, and never repaired. No one will be able to fix it for her. Bella's heart will be incomplete until Edward returns and fills in the holes. Edward will never be whole unless he can keep her for eternity, for she will always have his heart.

It's as simple as that, and Edward is too stubborn to admit it.

The week that followed our leave from Forks, Edward shut himself in his room, playing classical music to drown out all of our thoughts. He tried running away from me the most. He knew all my thoughts were correct. Leaving Bella would be his biggest regret, and the biggest mistake of his life.

He already knew that. However, he never thought it was a mistake. Edward refused to believe that what he was doing is irrational and downright stupid. He believed that it was the right thing, the noble thing to do. He thought he was saving her immortal soul and her human life. Without his presence, he believe, she could live a normal life and maybe have a normal family one-day.

But he was so wrong.

How could anyone who had a love as deep as theirs move on? How could she hope for a normal life after she learned the dangers that lurk around every dark corner in the world? Bella would never have a normal life. She would never have a normal family.

If I knew Bella at all, I knew that she would not be able to move on. I feared that she would go mad, the sensible part of her brain trying to tell her that we did not exist. After all that is the normal defense mechanism. However, I knew that she would do everything she could to hold on to the memory of Edward, to the memory of our kind.

Edward did not realize that he was sentencing her to a lifetime of worrying and a daily fight to keep the memory of my family alive.

Edward did not even stay a week with us in our new home in New Hampshire. He was losing his mind with his own thoughts. Watching him go about his day for the short time he was with us, anyone could tell how much pain he was in; how every hour was a struggle for him not to run back to Forks and taking Bella back in his arms.

He left us then. He would never leave Bella in a world where he knew someone had smelled her intoxicating sent. He could rest well without destroying the vampires who knew of Bella.

So, he left us to track down Victoria. He traveled back to Washington, making sure not to go anywhere near Forks, but close enough to catch her scent. He traveled down to Texas and Oklahoma, until he started to follow a trail south to Brazil.

He checked in with us once a week, reminding me furiously not to see Bella's future anymore. _We have done enough damage, Alice. _He always told me. And for the last four months I have done a good job not seeing anything that involves my best friend.

However, some things are bound to slip through.

It was a snowy day in December. Jasper was at the library with Carlisle reading up on medicine. Esme and I were working on the new house we bought, trying to make it comfortable.

Emmett had stopped by for the day after he and Rosalie got into a disagreement. Apparently she didn't like the fact that he mentioned something about Forks. Rose, besides Edward, will not hear anything that involves that town or the people who inhabit it.

I was painting the midnight sky on the ceiling in Edward's room (if he ever decided to move back home) when suddenly everything went black.

_I was outside in behind Bella's house. There was no snow on the ground yet, but the grass was moist from the rain. Bella stood in front of me, with her back to the house facing the woods. She looked different to me. She gained weight, but not in a bad way. Her face was fuller and there was something about her stomach. It was rounder, only a little but it was still strange._

_She ran her hands through her hair looking frustrated as she glared at the house. "I have to tell someone," she mumbled to herself. _

Then everything faded. Her future faded! I was suddenly back in Edward's room looking up at his ceiling with a paintbrush in my hand. How could a future fade like that? Futures do not just disappear.

But before I could wonder, before I could even moved, I was sucked back into Bella's future.

"_No!" she screamed holding her hands out defensively. "Don't get angry. It just happened! He left before he had any idea, before I had any idea! Please, please just listen to me Jac-"_

"Alice," Emmett asked softly staring up at me. "Alice, what did you see?"

I shook my head lightly. I didn't understand what I did see. Bella was yelling something, trying to calm someone down. But her eyes, her eyes looked so frightened.

I looked down at Emmett calmly, and smiled at him. "Edward just got thrown off coarse again and had to retrace his steps." I laughed softly stepping down off the latter. "He really is no good at tracking."

**Bella's POV**

The days were growing shorter and the nights were growing longer as December continued on. I was about sixteen weeks pregnant now. My stomach was slowly growing, causing me to wear baggy clothes so that no one suspected anything, and thankfully no one did.

Charlie didn't notice my strange craving; however, I think he believed that my growth in appetite had something to do with my way of coping in losing Edward. Jacob didn't question my outrageous mood swings, or comment and my fatigue state.

My visits to the doctor, while lonely and terrifying that something may be going wrong, were fine. Everything was fine with the baby. It was growing stronger every day, and simply growing every day. But thankfully it was at a very normal rate.

Dr. Booth kept telling me how lucky I was for being so young. He said the baby was extremely healthy and very strong. However, with each visit he kept on questioning me who the father was and if I was going to tell him.

My answer never changed. There was no one to tell, no one to confide in. It was me, and I was doing fine on my own.

It was a lie though. I have never felt so alone in my life than I did lying on my bed, looking at the picture of my baby growing inside of me. I was surrounded my friends at school, yet I felt completely isolated.

Since Jacob told me his secret, though, I felt like I did have someone who would be able to deal with the news. I knew I shouldn't put the burden on him, especially since his pack would not like the idea of a half vampire baby coming into the world.

Yet, with Jacob I felt as though I could be myself around him. I felt more secure with him than I have felt with anyone since Edward left. Jacob would protect me from his pack. He would help me through this time, and maybe give me the courage to tell Charlie.

So I asked Jacob to meet me outside of my house. I waited, pacing up and down the yard telling myself I had to tell someone. I had to take this burden off of me.

Jacob walked through the forest in cut off jeans and a black t-shirt. He smiled as he approached me engulfing me in a hug. I closed my eyes trying to control the sudden need to throw up as Jacob released me.

"So, what is so important that you summoned me here?" he asked laughing.

I forced a smile looking down at the grass between us. "Jacob, there is something I have to tell you. I need you to be calm and just listen to everything I have to say. Okay?'

He raised an eyebrow, but nodded anyways, gesturing me to continue.

I took a deep breath. "Jacob, I'm pregnant."

I looked up to see him staring at me, his mouth slightly opened from the shock. "Don't worry, the baby is fine. My doctor keeps telling me that everything is going normal, and it doesn't have any fangs or anything outrageous like that," I said quickly, laughing nervously.

"Why would your baby have fangs?" Jacob asked softly and slowly.

"What?"

"Why would_ your_ baby have _fangs_?" he asked loudly, his fist clenching, glaring at me.

I remained silent. Didn't he realize who the father was? Did he think I was a slut or something? "Bella," he said grabbing my arms, "did that _bloodsucker_ do this to you? Did _Edward_ do this to you?"

I threw up my arms in front of me backing out of his grasp. "No!" I screamed. " Don't be angry. It just happened! He left before he had any idea, before I had any idea. Please, please just listen to me Jacob!"

I continued to back away from him, suddenly fearing for my baby's safety. His eyes were black; his nostrils were flaring. He was glaring at me as if I were some sort of monster, not fit to exist anymore.

"We didn't expect for this to happen. Neither of us thought it was possible! When I found out that I was pregnant I did worry that the baby would be some sort of monster, but Dr. Booth keeps telling me that everything is going as it should. Everything is fine."

"You are carrying the devil inside of you, Bella," his voice shaking with anger. "You are carrying a _bloodsucking child!"_

I stormed up to him and slapped him as hard as I could across the face. "How dare you. You know don't what my child will be. It is innocent, Jacob Black. Don't accuse me of something that is not true."

Jacob grabbed my hands and threw them to my sides. "It's true Bella, and you know it. This baby will grow up to be a _leech_ just like its father! Bella, you need to get rid of this… this _thing!_"

"Jacob, this is my baby. It's not some thing that can be tossed away. And it doesn't matter anyways. I will not get rid of it."

Jacob backed away from me pinching the bridge of his nose, squeezing his eyes shut. His body was shaking with angry. "Bella, go inside now."

I took a step closer to him, protectively placing my hands over my stomach. "Jake? What's wrong?" I asked softly.

He growled at me, as he looked up at my face. My eyes went wide as I slowly backed away from the monster staring at me. His face was transforming, his nose was now longer like a snout. His teeth grew to be razor sharp fangs, while his eyes were large ovals full of hatred.

He was becoming a wolf.

I was not safe around him; I was not safe anywhere.


	4. We Build Then We Break

A/N: Okay so I'm back in school from my long break, so updates probably won't come as fast as they could. Also I still have to work on my other stories and I have been thinking about starting a whole other story. I kind of have ADD with my stories it seems to be. Well anyways I hope you enjoy this chapter. Also as much as I love getting alerts I love reviews so much more!

I don't own anything remember.

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><p>Everything happened so quickly. One minute I was finally telling my secret, a secret that has weighed down on me for four months now. I was telling Jacob the only person who has been there for me since Edward left me. He was supposed to be my safe harbor, the one I could tell anything to.<p>

Suddenly I was aware that was not the case.

As soon as he heard the words slip from my mouth he began to change. Not in the human way where he would slowly faze me out. No he changed the supernatural way where he started to become a werewolf.

His eyes were the first things I noticed. At first they flashed gold, changing from the warm brown ones I was just looking into, to cold black ones. His teeth quickly changed into sharp daggers. Then suddenly before I knew it, there was a wolf staring right back at me.

My eyes went wide as he growled at me. I backed up slowly, my hands out protectively in front of my stomach, until my back hit the side of the house. Jacob's eyes turned into slits as he lunged for me, rage taking over every instinct he had. He was blinded by a moment of furious passion.

I threw up my arms protecting my face from his claw. The swipe threw me to the floor, pain shooting up and down my arm. I looked down only to see blood pouring from the deep cuts in my arm.

And then everything went black.

_Beep…Beep…Beep…_

I groaned rocking my head back and forth. The pain in my arm steadily increased as I came to. I could feel the scratches on my arm pulsating with every breath I took. I didn't know where I was, how I got here, or what I was doing before I came wherever I was.

Opening my eyes, I noticed how clean everything seemed to be. Everything was white and smelled like Clorox. I blinked a couple of times seeing the machines attached to my arm now.

There were white bandages wrapped tightly around my right forearm. I ran my hand over my arm trying to remember what caused me to come to this place. I remember Jacob… something about Jacob.

I was outside. Why was I outside? I wanted to tell Jacob something? My hand slid down from my arm to my rounded stomach. Ah. Right.

I was going to tell Jacob that I was pregnant. I couldn't remember. I felt like I did. That would explain everything, but at the same time I had this nagging feeling that I didn't and now everyone is going to know and this wasn't suppose to be the way they found out.

I didn't want a doctor to tell my father that I was carrying a baby. I wanted to be able to tell him on my own terms. But I guess I had five months, five months to suck it up and tell. I could have walked up to him the moment I found out for sure and told him, but I didn't. I thought I could keep it a secret. But till when? When it was finally time to give birth?

How naive was I?

How was I going to keep this a secret from everyone? I was gaining weight all the time, eating strange foods, getting sick in the morning, wearing over sized clothes all the time now. How did anyone not question me?

Just then the door opened and Billy wheeled in. I gave him a confused look as he came over to my bedside looking grave.

"Bella," he said shortly.

"Billy," I nodded. "Where is my dad, or Jacob for that matter?"

He raised an eyebrow as he studied my appearance, his eyes lingering on my hand place protectively over my stomach. "Do you remember what happened to you? How you ended up here?"

I shook my head slowly. "Not really. I remember being out side with Jacob, but I don't remember why I was out there or how I got here."

"You told him that you are with child," Billy said slowly. "Of course, that is not something a best friend likes to hear. However, he would have supported and helped you. When Jacob realized who was responsible for putting you in this position, he couldn't control his emotions. I do not blame him for that."

"Jacob did this to me," I whispered harshly. Then it all came back to me.

I had a plan. I was going to explain the changes I was going through. I was going to remind him how much he meant to me and how much I really valued our friendship. Then we were going to sit down in the grass and I was going to very calmly tell him that I was pregnant.

When I saw him, however, it all just came out in a rush. I was bottling so much inside of me, I just wanted to let it all out to someone, and Jacob happened to be that first someone.

I remember seeing his eyes change to a startling yellow as his teeth grew into fangs. I remember backing up until my back hit the wall, not fully understand what was happening or how to get away. Then I remember throwing up my arms to protect my baby.

Billy nodded slowly, looking sad but not as if I did not deserve this. "It happened fast. You're lucky he was able to control himself better than Sam."

"So what, you don't care that Jacob did this to me?"

"Of course I care Bella, but I am not going to punish him. It was not his fault and truthfully I do not blame him. What he did was the right reaction to your situation."

"Attacking a pregnant woman is alright?"

He rolled him eyes at me and shook his head. "No. Attacking the enemy is alright."

I lifted myself up onto my elbows only to be force to lie back down from the pain in my arm. "Billy, I am not your enemy. I never have been!"

"You are carrying a vampire, Bella. I cannot stress how much this affects our kind. We never thought it was possible. And Jacob, he never wanted this to happen to you. He is just worried about what may happen to you."

"And you don't think I am? I'm so worried that something may happen to the baby or me. And do you think I had any idea this would happen? Do you think I would have let it happen if I knew it was possible?"

"I know," he said slowly. "The reason I am in here explaining this to you instead of Jacob is because he is forbidden to see you again. So long as you plan on having that baby, Jacob is not allowed to have contact with you."

His words stung, but it just kept coming. "From now on, you are one of _them_. You are no longer allowed of the reservation. You will no longer be welcomed to any of our pack."

He slowly backed up and wheeled out of the room. He stopped at the door, however and looked back at me. "I am sorry, but this is the way it has to be."

I stared after him, not sure what to think. Do I yell after him? Tell him it isn't fair what he was putting me through. I mean I didn't ask for this to happen to me. I never meant to hurt Jacob. But I don't think he realized how much he hurt me.

I'm not even talking about how he recently sent me to the hospital. I'm talking about the fact that he has been telling me for weeks how I could tell him anything. Especially after I've learned his little secret. It even hurt me that he never realized that I was pregnant or there was something wrong with me. Anytime he asked he would just assume I was upset about _him_. He never questioned my constant fines or my brush-offs anytime he asked me something too personal.

I was hurt that he didn't know me any better than anyone else no matter how much he insisted that he knew me better than I knew myself.

Jacob lied. That's what hurt me the most.

I didn't have a lot of time to fester my anger for Jacob, however. Shortly after Billy left, Charlie walked in. I immediately felt the shame, worry, and scared emotions I have been holding out on.

Charlie's face was hard to read. He looked hurt, almost like he couldn't believe that I didn't tell him as soon as I found out. He was angry, that much was for sure. Angry that his only daughter was now pregnant by the man who left her alone in the woods. He looked sad for me; sad that I wouldn't have the life he and my mother had hoped for me. He also looked worried, like he was worried about my well being.

"Hey Bells, how are you feeling," he asked coming to my bedside trying to act as calm as possible.

"I'm okay."

He nodded and then silence fell over us continuing on a couple very awkward minutes. "Look dad, I never wanted you to find out this way," I started, words pouring out of my mouth. "I wanted to tell you, I was just so worried what you might say, and I didn't want to disappoint you. It just came to a point where I didn't know when I could bring it up. I think there was a part of me that thought that you would just… I don't know, know."

Charlie watched me for a little while until his eyes roamed to my stomach where my hand was still protectively over it. He nodded slowly. "Bella, the doctor could tell me you were pregnant because technically you are an adult."

"Oh."

"But when I came in earlier to my sure you were okay, I noticed how much you've, um, grown. Then Jacob stopped by to tell me what happened with the wolf. Speaking of which, I thought I told you not to go into the woods by yourself until we caught that animal tearing people apart. You're lucky you didn't get killed."

"Dad, I know. I didn't mean to go into the woods, I just told Jacob to meet me there because, well I don't remember why."

"The doctor said how dramatic your accident was may cause some holes in the memory before the attack."

I nodded. "But what were you saying about Jacob?"

"Oh, right. Jacob came to tell me about your attack. I questioned him if he knew anything about your condition and that's when he told me everything." He took a deep breath, readjusting his position in the chair. "Look Bella, I wish you would have told me. I thought you knew you could come to me with any problem, or at least you mother. However, I am proud of you for being able to handle this. It takes a lot of character. Since you've been keeping this a secret for…"

"Five months," I said softly looking down at my enlarged stomach.

I heard the intake of breath, which Charlie let slowly back out. "Since you've kept this a secret for five months now, I am assuming you are thinking about adoption?"

That caught my attention. I looked into Charlie's eyes trying to pick out his emotions on this subject. He looked almost hopeful that I would tell him yes I did not want to keep this baby. I think he believed that this way I would be able to have the life he and my mother always wanted for me. To go to college and met a human of my dreams. I knew now that that would never happen.

"Dad, the reason it probably took me so long to tell you about the baby was that when I first found out I wasn't even planning on having it. However, I kept putting it off until I realized that it was too late for me to be able to deal with myself if I did that. Then I thought about adoption, but I could never have someone else raise my child." _Because no one else could deal with a half-vampire child,_ I thought.

"Dad, I'm keeping the baby. I want to raise it myself."

Charlie smiled at me, putting his hand over mine on my stomach. "I knew you were going to say that. I just didn't want this kind of life for you, especially without the _father_ around. Did you even talk to him?"

I shook my head slowly. "No. He left before I realized and we didn't even think this was possible."

"No teenager ever thinks it will happen to them."

I laughed without humor. I actually had a legitimate reason to believe so, though. "Yeah, we're all pretty stupid."

Charlie laughed as well. "So do you know the sex?"

I shook my head. "No I have the opportunity to find out during my next appointment, but I'm not sure if I want to."

"Why not?"

I shrugged. _It would make everything more real._ "Dad, will you do something for me?"

He smirked. "Of course Bella."

"I know this is going to sound crazy, but I wrote a note to you and mom. It's in my room in this shoebox in my closet. I wrote it in case I didn't tell you guys, even though I knew I wouldn't be able to keep it a secret for forever. Anyways, it just says that if something were to happen to me while giving birth I want you to find the Cullens and give them the baby."

"What?"

"I want," I said slowly, "Edward to take care of this child if anything were to happen to me."

"Why Bella?" he asked tensing up. "Why should I allow someone who left you to take care of my grandchild? And where are these thoughts coming from? Did the doctor say something?"

I shook my head quickly. "No, no. I guess it's just every mother's worry that they won't be able to take care of their children. And I don't know. If something were to happen to me I want to make sure that I'm doing the right thing for my child."

"Wouldn't the right thing for your child to be to stay with a family that will love it?"

"Edward will love it dad," I pressed. Even if he didn't love me, he would always love our child.

"But he left Bells."

"He didn't know!"

Charlie put his hands on my shoulders softly pressing me back into the bed. "I know Bella, I know. I guess I just don't understand why your mother or I couldn't care for it. I don't understand why we would try to find the guy to take away our only grandchild, when he never knew that he's going to be a father."

I took a deep breath. "I can't explain it dad. I just hope that you'll respect my decision. This baby should have a father, dad. Even if he doesn't know about it yet. He'll be ready; he'll be able to give the baby a good life," I said softly, a tear slowly escaping my eye.

He nodded and softly squeezed my arm. "Nothing is going to happen to you, Bella. You and your beautiful baby is going to be fine," he said smiling.

I smiled back at him.

My smile was forced though; it was fake. I knew it was all a lie. I wasn't going to make it; there is no way I was going to be able to make it. It was like I was hallucinating Edward's voice again, but this time he was telling me it was all over.


	5. Firm Believer

A/N: Sorry it has taken me so long with all of my stories. This semester has just been kicking my ass academically. Then unnecessary drama just likes to enter my life to make things so much more difficult. Then I come back from school and my laptop broke so it took me a week to get that back. Now I am good to go.

Hope you enjoy! Ps. I don't own anything. Not even the title of the chapter.

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><p><strong>Edward's POV<strong>

There were moments in the days I would see her face. Whether it was in the swaying trees around me, or in the sky above me, I would always see her beauty. Moments where I would just stare at the fading memory of her, my true love.

I was holding onto her memories, almost as though there would be a moment were I wouldn't dream about her anymore. As though I may forget her deep, brown eyes, or heart shaped face. I held onto her memories for dear life.

If there was one thing in this world I wish I could do it would be to sleep. I would sleep forever and there is only one person I would see. Bella. I would see her in my dreams; I would live in the life that I have always wanted for her.

But I couldn't.

I couldn't live that life with her. I was putting her in danger every time I was near her. There was not moment clearer of that fact than at her birthday party. So, I did what I believed was the right thing to do. I left.

I bottled up her dream-like scent to take with me on my journey so I would always remember the woman I loved more than my existence itself. I knew forgetting her would the hardest thing I would ever have to do, but to stay away I needed to try.

But, like I've told myself over and over again, I was afraid of forgetting her. I seemed to believe that forgetting would mean forgetting my humanity. Being with my Bella made me feel almost human. Taking away that constant thought of the monster buried deep inside of me.

If I forgot her, then I was forgetting whom I used to be, who I wanted to be for her.

Life is ever changing, though. It's been five months, three days, and thirteen hours since I've last seen her face. At that moment, however, it was not a face I wanted to remember.

Her expression was so pained and so betrayed that I did not believe I was strong enough to leave her. A part of me wanted to just pull her into my arms and tell her everything would be okay.

But I didn't. I walked away from her. I left her and hurt her like I promised her I would never do. After _that_ night I promised her I would never betray her trust. But like so many things in my life, I had to act like it was all just a lie to me.

I had to lie about so many things, what would one more lie do to me? Bring me down to a point that I have been considering becoming a bonfire.

That moment in time, when I held her in my arms tracing her lips with my fingertips, was a moment of peace I have never experienced before. It was a moment that I never thought I could have.

That memory just reminded me that my life would never be filled with purposed when I am away from her. Everything would become gray in my life, losing all meaning and color. Losing everything I lived for.

That night with her was the best night of my existence. Everything just felt so right, so perfect. A proposal was on the tip of my tongue, but she was peacefully asleep, feeling protected by the monster holding her. That night was the night before her birthday.

I stopped thinking for only a minute and by the time I realized how much I could break her, it was too late. Only I didn't. I didn't break or hurt her; looking into her eyes just made me want to love her and show her how much I did.

I regret that night now. I should have never let it happen. I knew that it was only a matter of time until I had to leave her. I should have known how dangerous it, how she would always be an inch away from death if she was around me or my family. I was disgusted with how many times I put her in danger and didn't even care about it.

However strong that memory is, though, it cannot replace the look on her face when I left. I replay it over and over in my head; remember every little detail, no matter how hard I try to forget it. But I can't shake the feeling that there was something off about her scent. It was almost as though her scent and my scent were mixing.

This never made any sense to me, considering I was not around her for most of that day and the day before. My scent should have disappeared. Was there something I was missing? Was she acting any different before I left?

No, she acted the way she always did. Almost a little timid. We never had a chance to talk about what happened _that_ night. And there was a part of me that believed that she heard me whisper to her asking her to marry me.

What must she think of me now?

My phone buzzed in my pocket. "Alice."

"There something not right with my vision," she said shortly and irritatingly.

"What do you mean by that?"

"I start to have visions and then suddenly they stop and everything goes black. It's like that person no longer exists or their future just disappears."

"Is it a certain person your visions aren't working for, or it is multiple people?" Yet, as I am asking this I know what the answer is going to be.

"Well, It only happens when Bella-" Alice started, sounding worried.

"Alice," I said shortly. "How many times did I ask you to not look into her future? We've done enough damage, caused enough pain."

"I know that Edward but-"

"No Alice. Please, just stop looking for her future. She isn't our concern anymore."

"Is that what you think Edward?" Alice hissed into the phone. "That she isn't our concern anymore? Then why are you tracking Victoria?" I remained silent, caught in my own lie. "That's what I thought. Edward, we will always be concerned about her. She was part of the family, rather you like it or not.

"And I have not gone 'looking' for her future Edward," she stated. "It comes to me, and most of the time she seems to be very anxious or worried about something. Almost as though she is in danger, but I can never found out from what because her future suddenly disappears."

How would Bella be in danger? That was the whole reason I left Forks, so that the danger and evil would follow my family and me. There is no one there to protect her. But protect her from what? What is there?

"Edward," Alice said softly, pulling me out of my trance, "I'm worried about her."

I ran my free hand over my face. The only way to be sure she was safe would be going back. If Alice really can't see her then there may be something wrong with her. However, I couldn't 'hear' Bella at all. Maybe she was becoming immune to Alice's ability.

"Edward!" Alice yelled.

"Alice do you think that maybe you can't see her for the same reason that I cannot hear her? There may be nothing wrong with her at all. She may just have some power that makes he immune to our abilities," I said patiently.

"No, Edward it's not like it just comes up blank. If I concentrate I can see her perfectly. It only happens sometimes."

"Alice do not interfere. Whatever is happening it is not something we need to get involved in. We could just make it worse," I said firmly.

Alice huffed into the phone. "I miss her."

"I know." I hung up the phone and fell to the floor. I had to convince myself that there was nothing wrong with her. If I begun to doubt myself then I would go back. If I saw her again I knew I wouldn't be able to leave her. I would have to touch her, hold her, and protect her. I could not just watch her without being noticed.

I missed her too much.

I sighed looking up to the sky. There was an overcast today. No need for me to hid from the public eye. Yet I couldn't bring myself to be around anymore. Having to listen to their constant complains about everyday life and why someone doesn't like them anymore.

The days began to change slowly. The sun would rise and fall as though everything in world was going in slow motion. Her face would haunt me during my travels, but it would also keep me going. I needed to make sure she was safe, even if I couldn't do it right next to her.

I was in the middle of South America, following what I assumed was Victoria's scent. However, the further south I got, the fainter her scent became. Something wasn't right. I just couldn't figure it out though.

"Hello?" I answered the moment my phone rang in my pocket.

"Edward?" Rosalie asked timidly. "There's something you should know."

"What is it Rose?" I asked impatiently.

"There was an accident."

**Bella's POV**

_Thump, thump. Thump, thump. _

The three scars on my arm were pulsating through the bandages that covered it. Even through it had been a week and the wounds were starting to heal, I couldn't get the image of Jacob changing and attacking me out of my head.

His large black eyes glaring at me, and his long fangs snaring at me were forever engrained in my mind. This just a sentence, my best friend turned on me. After the countless of times he told me he would never leave me and never hurt me, he let a moment of hatred ruin it all.

I ran my over my swollen stomach absentmindedly. Five months and no sign that he will ever come back. After everything we went through last year he vanished without a trace.

I wanted to believe so much that maybe there would be something telling him that now was the time that I needed him most. I don't need him to save me; I just need him to be here.

I need the comfort, the reassurance. Instead I've lost my best friend, unable to talk to him anymore because he believes I am his enemy now. Instead of having some kind of comfort in my life I am miles away from my mother who understands me the most.

It was days like this where I wish I could just escape from the world. Run away and never look behind me. I would change my name and live a life I wanted. But I couldn't do this alone. This isn't a television show like Gilmore Girls. I can't go to an Inn and expect someone to take pity on me and give me a place to live free of rent as I worked my way up in the world.

I needed help, or a Fairy God Mother. There is only so little I could do for my child with no high school education. I needed to finish and go to college or take classes. I needed to provide for my tiny family. There clearly isn't going to be a father to take some of that responsibility from me.

I was on my own. I was finally starting to realize that.

I sat up quickly, causing myself to get dizzy and walked out of my room, swiping my keys from my desk. I hit the bottom stair to find myself face to face with Charlie.

"Bella, where are you going?" he asked with his hands on his hips.

"Ch-dad, I need to clear my head. It's been a very stressful week and I just need sometime I wrap my head around everything that has been happening," I explained making my move around him.

However, he stepped in from of me, his eyes traveling to my enlarged stomach. Since he found out about my condition, I stopped wearing my oversized sweatshirts and many layers of clothing. Instead I wore a cut T-shirt so that it slipped of my left shoulder. It was probably the most comfortable I've been in months. Although it did display my stomach for the world to see, and Charlie was still having trouble processing the fact that his only daughter was having a baby.

"If you are going outside you should really put on a coat. It's not even thirty degrees outside and all you have on is a T-shirt."

"Dad, I have been overheating in this house for months. Trust me when I say it will feel like Coco Beach out there."

"Bella I really-" he started until the phone rang. He huffed out a sigh and reached behind the wall to grab the phone.

"Hello, Swan residence?" he asked.

Whatever the answer to that question was must have been devastating. Charlie's face went completely white as he slumped back against the wall. He ran his hand over his face as he tried to compose himself for the person on the other end.

"I'll be right there," he said simply as he hung up the phone.

"Dad, what happened?" I asked as he grabbed his jacket off the couch and made his way to the door.

"Harry Clearwater had a heart attack. I'm going to the hospital to be with everyone and make sure that he is okay." He stopped in front of the door and turned around to face me, putting his hands on my shoulder. "Be careful. Please don't drive anywhere because the roads are going to be icy. I'll call you as soon as I know what is going on."

And with that he squeezed my shoulders and walked over of the house.

I slumped back onto the back of the couch. Harry was still pretty young to have a heart attack, only being a few years older than Charlie. He had two kids and a wife. What if something like that happens to me? What if I got into some kind of accident or get cancer later on down the road? What's going to happen to my baby if I am not around?

Then again I still didn't know if I was going to even make it to see my baby open up its eyes for the first time. I didn't know if was I was strong enough to carry a half vampire baby.

I took a deep breath and made my way out the door. Charlie could yell at me later, but I had to go to their house. I had to see if there was anything that may give me clue to where he may be. I had to make sure he knew that he was going to have a baby.

I started up my engine and made my way down the familiar roads that had become such a stranger to me these past couple of months when they were a daily occurrence before.

I went slowly to avoid any black ice that may be hidden in the road and continued on my way to the forest that surrounded their house.

Before I knew it I was in front of the ghostly house. The haze that consumed my mind for most of the ride suddenly disappeared as I walked up the front steps to the door.

Surprisingly enough the front door was unlocked making my break in much easier than I had anticipated. However, the outcome of my investigation did not go as I had planned.

The house was completely clean, minus the dust that was forming on the counter tops. The only thing that really remained in the house was Edward's piano. It sat off to the side of the foyer like it had always. A thick layer of dust covered the keys.

I sat down on the bench in front of the piano, rubbing my stomach trying to remember the first song I ever heard him play. It was Esme's favorite, soft and calm like herself. Then they left us alone as he started a song he created just for me. It was perfect in every way.

Thinking this, I felt a nudge on my hand. It was soft, but it definitely happened. I looked down smiling, wishing this room were filled with the people I considered family so that I could share this moment with them.

The moment my baby kicked for the first time.

I stay there for a while longer, wanting to savor the moment and try to call back old memories of the life that used to fill this place. Then finally, and slowly, I made my way back to my truck and turned back home.

Tears started to run down my face as the house escaped from my view. That was my own form of closure. I needed to see it one last time, have one last memory in it that didn't end in horror and sadness. I had to say goodbye to that house and the people who lived in it to finally get on with my life.

Now I may be able to move on. Not anytime soon, of course, with a baby on the way. But sometime in the future, however, maybe I'll be able to meet a normal guy and fall in love with him and have a family with him.

Maybe I can dream about the day where my heart no longer aches for those people. A day where I will finally be healed.

Driving down the road was almost peaceful. No one could talk to me and there was nothing that reminded me of him. I smiled as I passed a group of deer on the side of the road. I can live without anyone in my life. I'm a lot stronger than I believed I was.

My eyes widen as my hands clutched my steering wheel. Something blurred across the street, only a couple feet in front of my car. I slammed on the break as I swerved off the road.

My truck ran threw the guardrail crushing it below me as I continued to head downward. I tried slamming on the breaks again, but the mud on the ground only caused my truck to swerve back and forth.

Everything about my life started to flash before my eyes just as my car ran into a tree causing my head to crack off the window.

Then I was peaceful unaware of anything.

* * *

><p>Sorry this chapter took me so long. I promise it won't take me this long again. I will just need a little time to update my other stories and not have this horrible mood I am in now because it will affect my writing and that's not what I need for the next chapter. Anyways I hope you enjoyed it, I will try to update again next week!<p> 


	6. Drive By

Have you ever dreamed that you are floating above yourself watching everything go on? That dream where it's as if you don't exist anymore and what's happening below doesn't apply. There are moments where you want to scream, trying to stop something from happening or warn someone to watch out. Yet, no matter how hard you try, nothing comes out and the events still happen as they were going to.

The crash was like an out of body experience. I watched the truck serve from the road and hit the guardrail. I heard the squeal of the tires and smelled the smoke from the engine. And this scene seemed to continue to replay. However, no matter how many times I watched the crash from above I never saw what the truck was trying to miss.

There was always just a quick flash, then the crash, then darkness.

A darkness that consumes everything. It consumed all my senses and left me feeling as though I was drowning under it. No matter how hard I tried to swim out of it and get back to the crash, it would just pull me further and further down.

Nothing made sense as I continued in my limbo.

A flash of red was the only thing I saw in the darkness. A flash of red and an annoying voice screaming my name.

I just wanted silence. I wanted to rest. I felt like I haven't fully felt rested in months. I was always uncomfortable. Why was I always uncomfortable?

"Bella! Bella! Come on; come on," that voice called to me. As it did so I felt like I was shaking in and out of my darkness.

I didn't want to go back to reality. I enjoyed where I was, minus the reminder of the crash that brought me here. However, the limbo was peaceful almost.

Ugh, what was kicking me? Why was I shaking?

My eyes snapped open. Everything started to make sense again. Jacob leaning over me, screaming my name and trying to shake me awake. Then I remembered the reason why I was uncomfortable and the thing kicking me were related.

My baby was making a commotion. Almost as if to wake me up from my limbo.

"Jacob, what the hell?" I asked, coughing as I pushed him away from me.

"Bella!" he gasped, pulling me into an unnecessary hug.

"Jake, you're crushing the baby!" I said pushing him again, but it didn't make much of a difference.

His face darkened a little as he pulled away from me. "Do you remember anything that happened today? Do you remember the crash?"

"Parts of it," I said weakly as I sat up rubbing my growing belly. "How was I not crushed to death?"

Jake looked down shyly. "Bella, I know you must be mad at me for the way I've been acting since I found out about the baby, but I really had no choice. It was a pack decision and I can't go against the pack. I've never stopped protecting you.

"Since the day I had Billy tell you I can't be around you while you are carrying a half vampire baby, I've never left you alone. I have watched you every day. Earlier today when you went back to the Cullen's house, as much as it killed me, I had to follow you. I needed to understand why you were there. Then I smelled a sickly, sweet smell that I figured you were finally giving off their scent, but it didn't make any sense."

He paused rubbing his hand threw his hair. "If I wasn't there you would have died on impact."

"How were you able to save me?" I asked quietly.

"Werewolves are faster then most animals, besides the vampire, but our reaction time is the most superior. I was running beside you when you swerved. I was able to pulled your door off so when you mad contact with the guardrail you, thankfully, flew out of the car towards me."

"That seems really lucky," I said trying to suppress a laugh.

"Bella, it's hardly funny. It was extremely lucky. I've never been so grateful in my life to have this curse of mine. You and your baby would have been dead. Charlie couldn't have handled that." He looked down at his hands. "I couldn't have handled that."

"You can't protect me from everything Jacob."

He looked up, his eyes piercing through me. "What can't I protect you from? Sure things have to change now that you are having this baby, but I'm always going to be here for you. I'm never going to leave you alone."

I smiled helplessly and put my hands on his. "I know that Jacob, but there are just some things that are going to be out of your control."

"Like what?"

Just then wheels came screeching to a halt right outside of my house. Jacob's arms immediately wrapped around me as he hauled me up towards the back door. He put a finger on my lips to indicate that I should be quiet.

"Vampire," he mouthed to me.

"What would you have done if I was an actual threat dog?" a girl with pixie brown hair said with her hands on her hips. "Bella, I thought you were supposed to be dead?"

δ

"Alice?"

Jacob straightened up and put me in front of him. "With her here I'm breaking the treaty. Call me when the bloodsucker leaves Bella," he said quickly as he fled out the back door.

I turned to watch his fading silhouette in the snowy outside. I took a deep breath and turned back to the present matter on hand. Alice Cullen standing in my kitchen asking why I wasn't dead. And by the look on her face she's definitely going to have some questions about my condition.

"Alice," I said as calmly as I could despite the urge I had to yell at her, "what exactly are you doing here?"

"Bella, what have you gotten yourself into?" she asked, her eyes a wide as could be.

I put my head down and brushed past her as I raised my hand to my bump. "A lot has happened since you left me Alice."

"Bella when we left you weren't hanging around werewolves, getting into accidents, and you definitely not pregnant," she exasperated as she appeared suddenly in front of me.

"Well you're right on two accounts," I said bitterly. I thought I missed them. I _do_ miss them. But right now I'm furious. I am furious with all of them and Alice is getting most of my anger right now.

"If Jacob was a werewolf we would have known before we left, and I don't think Edward would have left you if he knew who you were hanging out with. And while you _were_ getting into accidents when we were around, nothing like the car crash that should have killed you today. So that only leaves one thing," she said slowly pacing around my living room.

I took a deep breath and moved towards the couch. "Ding, ding. You probably won't believe this but your brother is the father."

She stopped moving and stared at me as though she was trying to work out if she could believe me or not. She stood absolutely still for a moment with her eyes closed and took a deep breath. "His scent, it's definitely surrounding you; however it's harder to tell with the smell of wet dog everywhere. How long have you been hanging around vampires? Do you know how dangerous that is? Especially if you are carrying my brother's child!"

"Jacob hasn't been a werewolf for too long. And you have no right, absolutely no right, to tell me what I should and should not be doing," I said gripping the couch.

"Do you have any idea what it's like to think that you are so in love with someone that you can't imagine a world without them and then the next day they are gone? Then weeks later find out that you are having their child?"

She bit her lip and shook her head. "No, no Bella I don't."

"Let me tell you then. It sucks. I have felt utterly alone for months. I've been worried that I won't be able to make it; that the baby will be much stronger than me. Then what would I do? Do you know how hard that is to comprehend? That you may never get to meet your child? It is probably the worst feeling I've ever had to deal with. I had to make arrangements for my father and mother to find you and give Edward a child he didn't even know existed. I had to have faith that he would believe that it was his and that he would take care of it.

"I've almost exhausted myself to death worrying about what may happen if Charlie and Renee didn't follow my instructions, or if Edward tossed the baby aside like he did to me."

"Do you really think that low of us?"

"These are possibilities I had to consider Alice. I haven't heard from anyone in five, almost six, months. I don't know what you guys were thinking when you left town. I didn't know if anyone would believe that it was his."

"Even if it wasn't obvious that it was his child, he could never abandon your child."

I shrugged. Did she really expect me to believe that? "What are you doing back anyways? Are you the only one?"

She looked taken aback by my bored tone. "I saw the crash, but it suddenly disappeared before I could see the outcome. I was worried you were dead. However, I am the only one back."

I nodded staring into space, unconsciously rubbing my bump as my baby kicked me.

Alice smiled at me. "It seems to rest easier around me."

"How can you tell?"

"When I got here your dog was in the room with you, your baby was moving quite a lot. Almost like it was uncomfortable. But now, now I can barely hear it. It's content."

I looked down at my stomach rolling my eyes. Of course the people who left me would make my baby calm for a moment.

"Are you going to be mad at me forever?" Alice asked in a small voice. "I don't want you to hate me Bella, even though I understand why you may. I just want you to understand why we left so quickly."

"I don't hate you, Alice. I could never hate you. I've just be alone for so long I have become very bitter."

"I understand that, but you have to understand that we did this to protect you, even though I doubt Edward would have left if he knew werewolves still existed here. What happened on your birthday devastated him. He could bare the thought of losing you. So he asked us to pack up and leave in order to give you as normal of a life as possible."

"He had no right to decide that for me."

"I know that Bella, but you didn't see him that night. I don't think I've ever seen him act like that in the half century I've known him. He went crazy at how close you came to dying in our house. You know how protective he can be."

"It would just be easier for me to loving the fact that you are here right now if I hadn't be left alone while I was pregnant."

She nodded slowly. "I understand. Would you like me to leave?"

I looked up at her for the first time. Her eyes were pleading for me to forgive her, to allow her to stay and tell her everything about my life these past few months. However, there was a part of me that didn't care, which just wanted her to be gone so the hole in my chest could begin to repair itself again.

Of course there was the other part of me that just wanted them all back in my life. I wanted this lonely feeling to go away. I wanted to feel safe. I wanted to be protected and actually seeing my protector. Not only that I wanted all of my child's family around it so that it would be protected as well.

I still wasn't whole. When _he_ left, there was a part of me that went with him. Even if it was only Alice here, it does seem as though a small piece of me has come back with her. I don't know if I could survive if she left me again.

"No, Alice. I would love for you to stay," I said slowly spreading my fingers across my stomach.

She smiled and let out a huff of air she seemed to be holding for a very long time. Then her eyes traveled to my ever-growing belly. "Bella, I understand that you probably hate us, but please believe we would have never left if we knew."

"I know, but it's better that you didn't know."

"Why would you say that?"

"Well, because if you did know then I never would have known that Edward really has never felt anything for me. At least not like I thought he did."

Alice rolled her eyes. "I told him he was being an idiot. There is a lot more to the story, but he should probably explain it to you."

I gripped her hand in mine. "Alice, you cannot tell him."

"Isabella, you can be so stubborn. I can't not tell him. He needs to know."

"No," I said standing up and moving towards the tv, "I don't want him to find out."

"Why?" she demanded.

"Because I don't want him back here only because it is his duty. I want him back here because he loves me. So you have to promise me you will not say a word."

She appeared suddenly in front of me and put her hands on both of my shoulders comfortingly. "I promise I will not say anything, no matter how much I think he should know."

"Thank you."

"So, where is Charlie?"

"He's arranging a funeral. Harry Clearwater had a heart attack yesterday."

"I am very sorry, Bella. Is Charlie going to be okay with me staying here?"

"Yeah, I think he'll actually like it. He's really missed you."

Right on cue, Charlie walked in the door. His expression was wary and looked much older than he actually was. He looked worn out and just down right sad. I sighed and walked right over to him.

"I'm so sorry dad," I said softly putting my arms around him.

"Thanks Bells," he said sadly.

Suddenly he started chuckling. I looked up at him, completely confused. Was he losing it? "Dad?"

"The baby," he said through his laughter. "It's kicking."

I smiled at him. "Yeah it's been doing that a lot lately."

He stared in wonder at my stomach for quite some time. Suddenly he seemed to become very aware that we were not the only ones in the room.

"Alice? What are you doing here?"

* * *

><p>AN: Okay it's about to get good! The next chapter is probably going to be quite long so it may take me awhile to put up. I know this one took longer than I said it would. Work just makes everything more difficult. Taking care of thirty-some little kids, just gets me so exhausted. Hopefully, though, you won't have to wait for forever to read the next chapter.

Review please!


	7. Syndicate

"_Alice, what are you doing here?"_

I stared up at Charlie, trying to gauge his reaction. Shock, was the best way to describe it I think. I was in the same boat with him. Not a word from any of them for five months and then suddenly Alice pops up out of the blue.

Slowly, I could see the worry and anger in Charlie's eyes. He tore his eyes away from Alice and stared right at my stomach. I knew he was worried about the baby. He hated Edward for leaving and having Alice back probably had him worried that she wasn't the only Cullen.

"Charlie," Alice said quietly as she glided towards me, "I am so sorry about what happened to your friend. I just came back for the weekend to get some things I let at our house. I happened to see Bella's car at home and couldn't help but stop in to see her."

Charlie continued to stare at her, not comprehending why she was here it seemed. "Dad, I invited Alice to stay here for the weekend. I didn't want her to be _alone_ in her old house."

He seemed to understand what I was saying. "Of course you can stay here Alice. I would hate to think of you being all alone in the big house you have."

She smiled sweetly up at him. "Thank you Charlie. I promise I won't be any trouble."

"I never thought you would be," he said with a small smile. Then he nodded and walked past us. When he got to the kitchen he called me to follow him.

I rolled my eyes to Alice. We both knew why he wanted to talk to me alone. When I made it into the kitchen, Charlie grabbed me by the arm and pulled me close to him. "Bella, I know at this point you can't hide the fact that you're pregnant to her, but I do not want her to find out who the father is."

"Dad, she's been here for an hour. We've already talked about the father," I sighed. I know neither of us want Edward to find out, but I'm not going to allow Alice to think that I'm a slut and never loved her brother. "She needed to know the truth dad."

He sighed and shook his head slightly. "I know, this whole situation is just above my head. I didn't think I would ever have to deal with this when I held you in my arms for the first time."

I looked down in shame. "I know dad. I didn't think this would ever happen to me either."

"Bella," he said softly, putting his hands on my shoulder, "I don't want you to think that I'm ashamed of you, or that I am disappointed in you. You've shown so much strength during this whole thing. Many girls your age wouldn't take it as seriously as you have, and some wouldn't have even dealt with the problems. But you, you have made sure that everything is ready for the baby, even the worst-case scenario. I'm proud of you, Bells. You are shaping into a smart, responsible and beautiful young woman. This baby is very lucky to have you."

"Thanks dad," I said softly hugging him as much as possible with my protruding stomach in the way.

He patted me softly on the back. "Okay Bells, I need to change then I'm heading back to the reservation to help Mrs. Clearwater."

I nodded, wiping the tear that escaped away. "Be careful."

"You too honey."

I took a long deep breath before returning to Alice. I sat down next to her on the couch knowing fully that she heard everything that was just said in the kitchen. I didn't have the energy to acknowledge it, and Alice was good at ignoring it.

"So," finally voicing the thought I've had since I've seen her, "how long are you going to stay?"

She turned towards me, putting her hand on top of mine. "I wish I could said for as long as you need, but-"

"We both know you can't without _him_ finding out."

"Yes, Edward would not be happy to hear that I'm here right now," she said sounded slightly annoyed. "However, I think I can spare this weekend if that is alright."

I smiled sadly at her. "That would be great Alice. Oh! I should probably show you then," I said pushing myself up and wondering upstairs. I grabbed the picture off my mirror and slowly made my way down the stairs.

Alice met me at the last step, taking my hand, as she tried to help me over to the couch. I rolled my eyes but didn't say anything for once. Once we were settled I handed her the picture. "This was taken last week. That's my baby."

Alice took the picture in both her hands. Her eyes widened in wonder as she stared mesmerized by the life growing inside of me.

"Do you know the sex?" she whispered, not taking her eyes off the picture.

I shook my head. "No. Knowing would make it all seem so real. I don't think I'm ready to know."

She nodded. The quickly she put the picture in her lap, covering it with her hands. I looked at her quizzically until I heard Charlie making his way downstairs.

"Bye girls. I'll be back later tonight," he said grabbing his coat and walking out the door.

Alice moved, suddenly, to the coffee table in front of me. She held out the picture with longing eyes. "Here. I could tell Charlie didn't want me knowing much about the baby. I didn't think he would be happy if he saw me looking at it."

I shook my head. "Keep it if you want. I have a couple copies."

"Bella, I couldn't possibly-"

"If you don't want it just leave it on the coffee table. If you do, then just hide it from him. He won't know if you don't want him too," I said irritably as I pushed myself up and made my way into the kitchen. I hated that I was always hungry.

"He needs to know," she said quietly behind me while I made my sandwich. "He'd never forgive me when he finds out that I knew and didn't tell him that you have been carrying his child for the last five months."

"Truthfully Alice," I said as I put on a couple extra slices of pepperoni on the bread, "I don't care how mad he gets at you. This is my decision and if he finds out from anyone, it's going to be me and it's going to be in person. I'm not going to write him an email or leave a voicemail.

"And since," I continued slicing my sandwich in half, "he promised me I would never be bothered by vampires again, then I won't ever have to tell him. Which was my plan in the beginning."

"Bella he needs to know that he has a child!"

"Alice he needs to be here with me!"

"If you told him he would be," she said passionately. "He loves you so much Bella. Can't you see that?"

I narrowed my eyes at her and threw my arms up. "Then where is he Alice? In South America? If he really loved me then he never would have left me. And I don't care," I said holding up my hand to stop her from talking, "if he did it for my own good. Clearly that didn't work out the way he wanted it to. And truthfully Alice, no matter how much you may have thought he loved me, it clearly wasn't enough to make him stay. Someone doesn't just leave someone they love so much like that."

"I wish I could help you understand Bella. I wish I could explain his reasoning behind what he did to you, but it really should come from his mouth. Just know that he has always and will always love you. Vampires are not like humans, Bella. We mate for life."

"With the _right_ person Alice. Clearly that person wasn't me."

She rolled her eyes at me. "Then don't believe me Bella, but at some point you will learn the truth." Her face scrunched up suddenly. "Except not now. The _dog_ wants to talk to you."

"You don't have to leave you know," I said worried that she wouldn't come back.

"Yes, I do. I'll go grab something to eat in the meantime," she said giving me a wink. Then she vanished right before my eyes.

"Bella," Jacob said rushing inside and pulling me into a hug, "I'm so glad you're alright. I was so worried."

"Jake, you are crushing the baby," I said pushing him away from me. "There is no need to be worried about me Jake. With Alice here I am more safe then ever before."

"Bella, if anything you are in more danger with her here. That _bloodsucker _prevents me from being on this side of Forks at all times. Sam is going to kill me when he figures out that I am breaking the treaty."

"Then why are you here? Why break it?"

He took a step back and blinked at me a couple of times. "I was worried about you, that's why. I don't care how much you trust that _leech_. Things are different now Bella. I didn't know how she was going to react to your condition."

"What's that supposed to mean? She would never harm me or the baby."

"How am I supposed to know that Bella? She's dead! She has no heart, no soul. She may think it's taboo, or maybe that bast-"

"Jacob do not finish that thought," I said glaring at him. My fist clenched at my side as I hoped I could keep my composure enough to not slap him. "I know you think that you know everything about vampires, but you know nothing. They have hearts and souls. You just don't care enough to see."

He rolled his eyes at me and ran his hand down his face. "If you could have seen yourself when he first left you, you would understand why I feel the way I do about them. Then to find out that you are having his spawn."

"Child Jacob. It's not the devil!" I yelled at him.

"How do you know? He's a vampire Bella!" he yelled back at me grabbing both of my shoulders. "How does that even happen? It's against nature; that _leech_ goes against the laws of nature!"

"That doesn't mean this baby is going to grow fangs and turn into a bat at night Jacob! None of them do that anyways."

"It doesn't mean your baby is going to live off slim fast."

I bit my lip, trying to keep my mouth shut. Thankfully the phone rang, snapping us out of our argument. Jacob stared at me for a moment, before removing his left hand and picked up the phone.

"Hello, Swan residence," he said calmly, his eyes burning into me.

"No he is not, he's arranging a funeral," he growled into the phone and hung it back up. "Filthy _leech_," he whispered.

"What," I snapped, shrugging quickly out of his embrace. "Whom were you talking to?"

"The doctor."

"Carlisle? What did he want? What did he say?"

"He asked for Charlie, so I told him that he was planning Harry Clearwater's funeral."

"You had no right Jacob!" I yelled at him slapping his arm. Ow, he's built solid. "Why didn't you give the phone to me? You don't even live here!"

"He didn't ask for you, Bella. And you never mind before," he said taking a step back from me.

"That doesn't matter Jake! What if he thinks you were arranging my funeral? You didn't say Harry's."

"Why would they think Charlie was arranging your funeral?"

"Because Alice can see the future. She saw the car crash."

Jacob raised his eyebrow at me. He took a deep breath, analyzing what I just said. "That bloodsucker can see the future? Then why didn't she come earlier? Didn't she see you at the docter's office? Didn't she know that you were pregnant? How did she stay away this long Bella?"

I stare at him for a few moments, processing all of his questions. I didn't even think of that. Why wasn't she here earlier? She acted surprised when she saw my bump, so I just assumed that she didn't know. But she could have been acting. Edward made it seem like he hated me when we first met each other. Alice could have known the whole time.

If she did know, then why come here now? I get that she may have been concerned for me, but that doesn't mean she could just come here after five months of nothing. What would Charlie have done if I did die in that crash and he came home to Alice sitting on the front step?

Why is she here? Why come back into my life suddenly?

"Bella?" Alice's voice called.

"Get out of here!" Jacob yelled, stepping possessively in front of me.

"You're way past your territory _dog_," Alice hissed at him from behind me.

Neither of us even followed her movements as she sidestepped around us. A low growl came out of Jacobs throat as he pulled me against him.

"Jake, I need to talk to Alice. I'll call you when she leaves," I said softly looking up at him.

He stared at me for a few spare moments before nodding. He kissed me on the forehead and walked away. I closed my eyes for a moment, overcome with a sudden dizziness, pressing my fingers to my temple.

"Bella are you okay?" Alice asked putting her arms around me.

"Please, don't touch me," I said, waving her off as I made my way over to the couch.

"Bella something has-"

"No Alice," I said cutting her off as she sat down on the coffee table in front of me. "I don't want to hear it. Why are you really here? If you saw the accident then you would have saw all the doctor's appointments. You would have saw Jacob lose control and attack me. You would have been here earlier."

"Jacob attacked you? That _dog_ attacked you and you still let him in your house?" she asked grasping the edge of the table.

"He lost control when I told him about the baby. Alice, you know this!" I exclaimed after waving away her reaction.

"Bella," she said grabbing hold of my hands, "I didn't know any of this. When we left Edward made me promise that I wouldn't look into your future, but I have become so attune to you before we left, that some things did seep through. However, I did see a few things about you before the crash. Yet, they never finished," she exclaimed frustratingly as she stood up and paced the room.

"If everything I was seeing stopped the time that_ dog_ interfered then that's the reason I didn't know anything fully. But Bella, there is something more important before we discuss this further."

"What is that?"

"Edward went to Italy. He wants to be killed.


	8. Off A Cliff

A/N: Thank you for your patience everyone! What happened previously in my story: Bella got into a horrible car accident that would have killed her if Jacob was not there to protect her. Alice showed up because she had a vision that Bella had died in the car crash, since her vision vanished before she saw Jacob pulling Bella out of the reck. The wolves (namely Jacob) are going crazy that a Cullen is back, but Charlie allowed Alice to stay in his home while Alice tries to understand everything that is going on with Bella. Bella on the other hand is looking for her own answers. Before Alice could get too comfortable, though, she gets a call telling her that Edward is off to Italy to have himself kill.

I don't own anything. If I did I wouldn't be in college killing myself over finals.

* * *

><p>Edward. Just his name was enough to get me to fall over. But she kept going….<p>

The love of my life, the father of my child, was on his way to Italy to meet with the Volturi in order to be killed.

I back up slowly until I felt the wall behind me. Then I slid down it with my hand on my bump. Why would he do this? Was leaving me not a punishment enough? He had to go and get himself killed! Why, why would he do this? It makes no sense to me. It's not like he has known anything about my life since he's left. None of them had. Until…

"Alice," I asked weakly, not able to take my eyes off the floor in front of me, "did you tell anyone why you left?"

Suddenly I heard Alice ruffle through her jacket until she produced a slender silver phone, which she quickly flipped open and begun dialing. "Rose, it's Alice. You wouldn't have happened to tell Edward that I was coming to Forks because I had a vision that Bella was dead, did you?"

She paused for a moment, tapping her foot. I looked up in time to see shock, hurt, and betrayed emotions flash across her eyes. "Rose how could you! I told you not to tell him anything until I got some answers!"

Another pause as Rosaline plead her case. "Well, guess what, I was wrong! That's right Bella's not dead, quite the opposite. And now because of your medaling, Edward has hoped the first plane he could get to and is on his way to Italy to meet the Volturi."

I faintly heard Rosaline's high-pitched voice full of concern. "Say it Rose," Alice hissed as she snapped the phone shut. She pinched her nose with her fingers as she became very still. Minutes later she blinked her eyes a couple of times before they focused on me, still sitting on the floor.

She walked over to me, holding out a hand to help me up. I rose gingerly putting a hand on my back to help my momentum. "Alice, we have to stop him somehow. If I called him-"

"He would figure out a way to debunk it. Esme is very good on a computer and could figure out a way to manipulate something one of said to make it sound like you," she said quickly waving that thought away.

Impressed as I was, I couldn't dwell on the fact. "Well… why?"

"Why what Bella?"

"Why the hell is Edward on his way to Italy? From what I gather, Rosaline told him about your vision. So what?"

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. So what if he thinks I'm dead. What would make him want to be killed just because I'm dead?" I asked throwing my hands up. "He _left me_. He's the one who walked away. How does that give him the right to decide to kill himself just because I'm dead?"

"Bella, you're not making any sense. Did you really believe him?" Alice asked narrowing her eyes at me.

"How could I not? He looked at me straight in the eyes and told me that he doesn't love me anymore. If he for some reason felt guilty for my death that still doesn't justify killing himself when he should be thinking about how that will affect his family."

"Bella, we don't have time to discuss this. He has a head start on us because he has been trying to not plan anything ahead of time in order to keep me out of the loop. However, that's hard to do," she added with a rueful smile. "We have to go to Italy right now. Do you have a passport? I don't have time to forge one for you."

"I have one, Alice. But what do you mean _we_ are going to Italy? What do I have to do with this?"

"Everything Bella. You're only five months pregnant so you are still allowed to travel," she said brushing past me as she ran upstairs into my room.

"Alice! I'm just going to slow us down! It's not like I can run!" I yelled after her. In my room she was throwing random items into a duffle bag and rummaging through my things until she found my passport in my draw.

"He has to see that you are alive, Bella. He would never believe any of use if we told him. He has to see it for himself," she stopped and grabbed my hands. "Please Bella. I cannot lose my brother like this. It will be my fault."

I took a deep breath looking into her pleading eyes. There was no way I would be able to live with myself knowing that Edward killed himself because of me. "Of course I'll go Alice."

'Then we have to go right now."

"I need to tell Charlie."

"Hurry," she said as she ran past me and into her car.

I faintly heard the engine start as I made my way downstairs to the pad of paper and pen we kept by the phone.

_Dad_-I quickly scribbled down-_something has come up and Alice needs me for a couple of days. I promise to call as soon as I get to a phone. Don't worry I will be safe._

_Love Bella_

"You're leaving," Jacob's voice came from behind me. "For _that bloodsucker_."

"I have to Jake. He's in trouble," I said, not able to look at him.

He pulled my face up to look at him, causing me to have a dizzy spell. Man what was that? "You can't leave Bella. You're pregnant!"

"I know that!" I yelled jerking my chin out of his grasp. "But I can't let anything happen to the father of my child Jake!"

"He's barely the father! Where has he been the past five months?"

"About as present as you've been! Jake, you can say what you want, but I'm going. If there is a way for me to save him then I will."

I brushed past him, opening up the front door. Alice beeped the horn motioning for me to hurry up. I rolled my eyes knowing she's somehow going to carry me through the airport so we move faster.

Jacob caught up to me and took my arm to spin me around. "Don't Jake!" I yelled trying to pull my arm away, but he only held me tighter pulling me towards him. "Jake seriously. Let me go."

"I can't Bella. I will be here with you the rest of the way. I don't care what Sam says. I will protect you and the baby and help you raise it! You don't need the bloodsucker in your life. Just please, stay here with me."

I tried again, and failed again, to get my arm away from him. "Jacob, please," I pleaded.

Alice was suddenly at our side pulled Jacob's hand off of my arm. "Watch it _dog_. You may be ready to take care of a child that is not yours, but that baby inside of her belly is not ready to have a werewolf stepdad. Can't you see you are making her sick! Now leave, we are on a schedule," she snapped, pulling me away with her and towards the car.

"Sorry Jake," I called behind me as Alice closed the door.

The last thing I saw was his hurt and confused expression getting smaller and smaller as we sped ahead.

δζ

Once on the plane, with all eyes on my stomach, Alice tucked her knees under her chin, closing her eyes. "Alice, why does Edward have to see the Volturi?"

Her eyes snapped open and focused on me. "Oh right, I forgot you don't know much about them, do you? Did Edward every tell you Carlisle's story?" I nodded my head remember the brave story of Edward's adopted father. "The three men with him in the painting behind his desk, they are Aro, Caius and Marcus. They are royalty in the vampire world. They decide the laws and the punishment if someone breaks them."

"Edward did say once if he were to die he would provoke the Volturi," I whispered.

Alice nodded. "That's a sure-fire way to get yourself murdered. See the Volturi have spent centuries making sure that our secret remains unknown. If anyone were to threaten exposing it, they wouldn't even ask questions before they tore them apart."

"So that's what Edward is going to do? Threaten to expose his… nature?"

"Yes, and right now he is being unreasonable and thinking about massacring the whole town in order to get their attention," she said, her eyes drifting off.

My eye widened. "He would never do that, would he?"

Alice focused her eyes on me again. "No, he wouldn't. He's just being irrational right now. He doesn't know what he will do if they refuse his offer."

"His offer?"

"He is on his way to meet with them now. Instead of just causing an outright scene. He decided to ask them for death."

"And if they grant it?"

She shook her head. "They won't. From the stories Carlisle has told us of his friend Aro, he would not want to waste Edward's gift."

"What does his gift have to do with anything?"

Alice opened her mouth and then closed it again. She turned her head to stare at the man next to us who was trying to listen in. She then turned back to me and leaned in closer. "Aro is a collector, if you will. Everyone who is in his coven has a special talent that will benefit him. The fact that Edward can read thoughts without having to touch someone, it's remarkable to Aro."

"So we'll have time to save him?"

Alice shrugged. "I really have no idea until he makes up his mind on how he is going to get himself killed."

"What our best option?"

"I'm not sure yet. His future is changing every minute." She went still for a moment, then a slow smile spread across her face. "Aro is going to refuse. He think it's such a waste, " she said with disgust.

"So we still have time?"

"Yes, and if Edward stays with his latest decision, then we may have a chance to stop him."

"What's that?"

"He is going to step out into the sun, simply enough. There is a Christmas market going on in town today, so it will be full of people. He is going to step out into the sun under the clock tower at noon."

"Will we make it?"

"We should, but it will be tight. Now please be quiet, I need to concentrate," Alice said softly, patting my hand, before turning in her seat and closing her eyes, becoming completely still.

I took a deep breath and turned to look out my window. I rubbed my belly trying to calm down my stirring baby. My nerves couldn't be very good for it. Isn't that the first rule anyways? Don't get stressed. Well that's clearly out the window now.

The plane from Portland to New York seemed to take three days to get there. Alice got a wheelchair for me so she could maneuver me quickly through the terminals. We barely got settled into our seats before the doors closed and the plane got ready for take off.

Then we were in the air on our way to Rome.

Alice was on the phone with Jasper for most of the plane ride there. I had my flight attendants come up to me throughout the journey to offer me another pillow or another glass of water or something else to eat. Clearly my condition didn't go unnoticed by anyone.

"Alice," I whisper, six hours into our journey, "what will the Volturi do when the find out that I'm pregnant?"

"They should never find out," she said simply. "If everything goes according to plane, we should be able to stop Edward from exposing himself by convincing him you are still alive, and then we should all be on the first plan back to the US."

"But what if someone who works for the Volturi see me. Will they assume that I'm pregnant with Edward's child? Will they be able to smell his scent like you did?"

"Bella," she said hushing me, "it will never get to that. The Volturi will never think it's possible for a human to be impregnated by a vampire. They wouldn't even consider it."

I swallowed hard. "Does that mean Edward won't think it's his?"

Alice gave me a sympathetic look. "That is a possibility. But he would never cast you aside. Bella, I know you think he doesn't love you, but trust me when I say that's not true. He loves you very much, and as soon as we are safe and on a plane back home, we will be able to explain everything to him. He will be overjoyed."

"How can you be so sure?" I asked still unsure that he would be happy to know that he abandoned me when I was pregnant.

"Because he is my brother. I know you probably don't believe me, but he's been miserable since we left. He thought it was for the best. And I know he should be the one to tell you all of this, but you need to know this before we land in Italy. Edward never stopped loving you. No matter what he told you when we left, it never changed the way he felt about you."

I nodded, not believing a word she said, but I couldn't argue about it anymore. I didn't want to think about that day, anymore than I wanted to be in this position. Running against time to convince Edward that I am alive, so he doesn't get himself killed.

We touched down in Rome an hour and half till noon. Alice was able to convince the flight attendants to let us off first and allow me to use a wheelchair. We sped through the airport to the rental cars that were thankfully shielded under in a garage from the sun.

She rushed me towards a flashy yellow Porsche, and helped me into the car. "We're stealing this aren't we?" I asked as she settled into the drivers seat.

"I figured you wouldn't be too against grand theft auto in this situation," she said calmly as she reversed the car out of its spot and switched it into drive before speeding away from the airport.

She weaved us through traffic with ease as we drove away from the city towards the hilly countryside of Italy. Images flew past me with such sped I could barely make out what anything was before it was a hundred yards behind us. Alice then reached behind her and pulled a large sweatshirt out of the duffle bag she packed for me.

"You should put this on," she said handing it to me without taking her eyes off of the road. "It will conceal your bump to a point."

"I thought you said it wouldn't matter, none of the Volturi will find out," I said shoving my arms through the sleeves. I was too hot to be putting this on, but I didn't see the point in arguing with her.

"You shouldn't meet them. When we do stop Edward, if one of them would approach you, I'm pretty sure Edward would tear them apart before he let them anywhere near you. I just want to be careful."

She made a sharp turn and sped up the hill. "Welcome to Volterra," she said sarcastically. "Now they won't let me drive all the way up to the clock tower before of the Christmas market, but I should be able to get you within a hundred yards of it, hopefully. All you will need to do is run to it before the clock strikes noon. That gives you about twenty-five minutes."

I gulped. I'm pregnant, not an Olympic runner! I could barely run when I wasn't carrying a baby without tripping over my feet. Does she really think I can do this now when I'm carrying ten extra pounds?

"You can do this Bella," she said softly looking at me for a moment before turning her attention back to the road. "Just run straight towards it. You should be able to make it there in time."

I nodded skeptically. Everything is relying on me now. If I fail, Edward will expose the vampires and he will be killed within minutes. Not only will I lose the love of my life, but also I'm sure the Cullens would want nothing with me after that.

Alice slowed down as we entered the town. It was old, almost like it came directly out of a Shakespeare play. The buildings were small with a stony outside appearance, with red roofs.

"There's the clock tower, Bella," Alice said pointing west of us. It was probably two hundred yards away from us. The clock clicked quickly on past the twenty-five minutes Alice had promised me.

Alice beeped her horn impatiently, trying to get the pedestrians to move quicker. She threw her hands up in annoyance before turning to me. "This is the furthest I can go Bella. I'm sorry, but you have to run. You have 23 minutes. Go!" she yelled reaching behind me to open the door.

I turned around as quick as I could and put my feet on the cobblestone streets ready to run for my life and Edward's.


End file.
